Peaceful Corner

Ways of Thinking  Positive - 2

Peaceful Corner.

 Appa, My father-in-law, was staying with me at Wai during his last few months.

In last few years he preferred to stay at Wai because it was very peaceful here. He stayed for variable periods and enjoyed the serenity. He was also contented with the company of his daughter. During his life he seldom had a chance to stay with her and now, it seemed, he was compensating for that whenever possible. Recently he had expressed a wish to die here.

And so he was here. Though he hated hospitals, he trusted me as a Doctor and probably felt safe to stay with me with my hospital facilities on the ground floor.

I had kept his bed in the corner of kitchen-cum-dining room. This way we could observe and take care of him easily. And he felt homely without the deadly feeling of being admitted in the hospital (or ghastly ICU where the patients feel that they are kept there to wait for death or, with all instruments and lines attached to their bodies they are being denied of the mercy of death).

For last two months, he was bedridden, unable to move on his own, probably in pain, totally dependent, with his memory failing and unable to speak except few words. He never complained. It was not his nature. But he was miserable. We could see it in his eyes. During whole of his life he had never expected anything and never asked of anything from anybody and now that he was bedridden he had to call us even for small things like water (let aside giving bedpan and cleaning). That made him more miserable.

Then, in spite of all care, he started to develop bed-sores. His condition started deteriorating. His lungs were congested and he was in distress intermittently.

He was in physical agony also during his last month. He groaned continuously during nights and days with intermittent periods of drowsiness, the only periods when he was calm.

Still he never complained. But we couldn’t see his condition. With him groaning next to us we couldn’t have food without feeling guilty. He was helpless and so were we. With no way back, and dead end ahead, we prayed for his death secretly in our minds.

Why anyone, who had helped so many people without expectation; had always wished all good things for others; had never hurt anybody in his life, accepted all ups and downs calmly and who had lived a simple and peaceful life without any complaint should suffer like this?  

Then one morning he was gasping. We were sitting around him holding his hands, my fingers on his pulse. With efforts and summoning all his strength he said a few words, “Sukhi raha” (be happy and contented). Then he went in stupor.

Such periods of ups and downs, with alternating periods of painful wakefulness, distressful drowsiness and semi-unconsciousness continued with increasing frequency and severity with increasing pain and distress. He died after fifteen days. God (if there is any), at last, was kind to him.

Next day we removed the bed from the kitchen, cleaned that corner and moved the dining table to its original place in that corner. Then I had a weird feeling. Despite temperament and training, our minds work irrationally. I thought, with this arrangement, we will dine everyday in the corner of agony and suffering.

Then suddenly my mind cleared. Why should I think like this? With his death the suffering has ended and he was at peace. So this corner has now become the Corner of Peace.

On the third day we went to the “Ghats” (Cremation place). There was a slight drizzle. The riverside was green. We collected the “Asthi” (bones) and washed the ashes. As per the custom we sprinkled “Go-mutra” and offered the flowers. Then we bestowed the collected bones in the river. I closed my eyes and prayed – You were calm and contented throughout your life. You suffered unreasonably for last months. But now may your “Aatma” (soul) dwell in peace – . 

I opened my eyes and saw a landscape of peace. The flowing water, riverside, green grass lawns covering the opposite bank, blue hills with dazzling green patches in the background and blue sky with some black clouds was a picture in all cool but lively shades of green and blue. I had seen the same landscape few seconds earlier (and many times before that). But now it was different.

Then the picture became hazy because my eyes were filled with tears. It was like a “Sakshatkar” (Awakening). I thought, he has given me a clear message that he was in peace.

It was His assurance. My mind also became calm. I realized once again, why should I worry …? I am LIVING in This 

Peaceful Corner in the world.

Man and a sparrow named “chioo”: 4

Man and a sparrow named “chioo”.

There was He and there was She. He chioo and She chioo.

He said, we will build a nest. She asked, Why?  He said, I don’t know. I feel like it … and I thought you will like to … She said, okay, yes, I will like to.

He brought one straw. She brought another straw. He said, you are tired, I will bring the straws.  She said, you are tired, I will build the nest. Then together they built a nest-home.

Then He brought one grain. She brought another grain. Then “bhurrrrrr”, he went and drank some water. She also went and drank some water. Then both brought one more grain each. They said, these are for our babies.

Then came the little baby Chioo in the nest. Days became small and “bhurrrrrr” they passed while bringing grains for her and taking care of her. She got little wings and she used to fly around, always twittering. The nest was always filled with her existence. Full to the brim with happiness. The home was home because of her. It existed and had meaning because of her. He and She didn’t realized how fast the days passed.

Baby chioo grew and her wings grew. The nest became insufficient and the piece of sky around the nest became small for her. When she found her He Chioo she flew away with him in their unlimited sky.  

Heart throbbed with concern and joy when she was in the nest and while she was learning to fly. And then there were tears of happiness of fulfillment and pain of parting when she flew away … .

Now again, only He and She remained in the nest. Once in a while He would say ‘Chiu-Chiu’ and She would say ‘Chiu’. Then sometimes She would say ‘Chiu-Chiu’ and He would say ‘Chiu’.

Then, sometimes, baby Chioo (now she was also a grown-up) would call over the wind. While she was on air the nest was full of her continuous twittering, as if she was flying around. Then there were only memories.

Still, as usual, reminding all these past things, the real sparrow “chioo” was twittering “chioo-chioo” and was flying ‘bhurrrrrr’ around. Her existence was a matter of fact. She was so familiar, that she was a part of his life.

But he didn’t know that. He still could understand nothing really.

Katha 21 – Man, Cherry and Apple – B

A man once got a big pumpkin. It was so big; it wasn’t necessary to show it.

Another man said, “Wow! You have got a big pumpkin. You have become a really great man now. Nobody has ever got anything like this before.”

First one said, “No, no! It’s not my greatness. I went this way by chance. But I walked till my feet bled. Then I got this. And that also because of my extremely good luck. Such big pumpkins are very few in this world. And I know many people who couldn’t get one, though they walked more than me, till death.

Then another man said, “Wow! You are really very lucky to get such a big pumpkin. You have become a great man.”

First one said, “No, no! It’s not my greatness. And even though I found it, this pumpkin is not mine. It is from god’s garden. It belongs to all. It is for everyone.

Then he called all of them and distributed it amongst them.

Then all of them said to each other, “he is really a great man”.

Katha 21 – Man, Cherry and Apple – A

There was a man. One day he got a cherry. He showed it to another man.

Another man said, “Wow! You have got a cherry. You have become a great man now.”

First one said, “No, no! There is no greatness in having this cherry. I was going on this way and I was a bit lucky. So I found this. We will eat it together. Then its sweet and sour taste will linger in our mouths. It will be fun.”

Then he gave half cherry to another man. Both ate it. The taste lingered for some time and the happiness in their eyes lingered even longer.

There was a man. One day he got an apple. He showed it to another man.

Another man said, “Wow! You have got an apple. You have become a great man now. But I have got only this small and sour cherry.”

First one said, “No, no! It’s not my greatness. It was my luck that I got this apple. If you would have gone this way, then you also could have got an apple. Now we both will eat it together.”

Then he gave half of the apple to another man. Another man also gave him half cherry and both ate cherry and apple happily.

One day one man got an apple. He showed it to another man.

Another man said, “Wow! An apple! You have become a great man now. I have only this cherry.”

First one said, “No, no! It’s not my greatness but luck. If you would have gone this way, then you also could have got an apple. Now we both will eat it together.”

Then he gave half of the apple to another man.

But another man didn’t give half of his cherry to first one.

Katha 02 – Man, bucket and water – E

One man used to get half bucketful of water every day.

So every day he used to say, today I have got only half a bucketful of water. When will I get full bucketful of water?

Then one day he got full bucketful of water.

So he was satisfied and happy.

One man used to get half bucketful of water every day.

Every day he used to say, today I have got only half a bucketful of water. When will I get full bucketful of water?

Then one day he got full bucketful of water.

Then he thought, what if I get two buckets of water today… I will be more satisfied and happier.

So, one man actually got two buckets of water one day. Then (as you may have guessed correctly) he thought what if I get three buckets of water today… and he actually got three buckets of water on next day. So he thought … and he actually started to believe in the power of Positive thinking.

So, one man actually got three buckets of water one day. Then (as you may have guessed correctly) he thought I am not satisfied. What if I get still more … and he actually got more. So he thought … and he became greedy. The more he got the more unsatisfied he became. That made him unhappy. And one day he got less and he became still more unsatisfied and unhappy.

So, one day one man told him, happiness has nothing to do with what and how much you get. Look at me.

Katha 02 – Man, bucket and water – D

One man used to get half bucketful of water every day. Every day he used to say, today I am happy with half bucketful of water.

But I am not satisfied. What if I get full bucket?

So he tried and did efforts and got more and more buckets of water. But he didn’t know what to do with excess water.

Other man also did more efforts and got more and more buckets of water. He used it properly to fulfill the needs. He was happy and everybody was happy.

But he was not satisfied. He had an ambition and he made progress.

And he started to believe in the link between efforts and fruit and between ambition and progress.

And there was another man who wished and got many buckets of water.

He believed in the power of wishing and Hope. He was convinced that efforts are not needed.  

But there was another man. In spite of need, strong wish and tremendous efforts he couldn’t get more water.

Unsatisfied he was. And he was also unhappy.

And there was another man who didn’t get any water. He didn’t even knew why he was dying.

Then there came Lord Krishna. He saw all these men and many others and thought.

Then he dissociated fruit from efforts. Because they were not associated in the first place and how could he possibly preserve faith in life?

But there is another point. We don’t know whether Lord Krishna needed water and how much he used to get daily.  

Katha 02 – Man, bucket and water – C

One man used to get half bucketful of water every day. So every day he used to say, today I got half bucketful of water. I am a happy man.

But I am not satisfied.

Then he thought, can anyone be happy but unsatisfied at the same time?

But anyway, he felt that way.

So every day one man used to say, today I got half bucketful of water. I am a happy man.

But I am not satisfied. What if I get one full bucket of water? I will try.

I got half bucket without efforts. With some efforts I may get full. What’s the harm in trying? Let me try.

So he tried and got full bucket of water. He said, now I am happy. But with more efforts I may get two. Let me try.

And he got two.

So he believed in efforts.

He did more efforts and got more and more buckets of water.

But he cannot understand what to do with extra buckets of water.

But there was another man. He also did more efforts and got more and more buckets of water. He used it properly to fulfill the needs of his family as well as people, animals and plants around him. And he used it economically because he new the efforts behind every extra bucket.

Everybody was happy and he was also happy. But he was not satisfied. He thought, probably I think big, I have ambition, that’s why I did more efforts.

And I made progress. And with me everybody progressed. 

He started to believe in progress.

And he started to believe in the link between efforts and progress.

And there was another man who was happy but unsatisfied with half bucket of water.

He thought, what if I get one full bucket of water? I got half bucket without efforts. What’s the harm in wishing? I will wish.

So he wished and got full bucket of water. He said, now I am happy. But with more wishing I may get two. Let me wish for more.

And he got two.

So he believed in the power of wishing. And he of course believed that efforts are not needed to get more. In fact he didn’t know what efforts are.    

And there was another man who was happy but unsatisfied with half bucket of water.

With wishing for more he got one and with efforts he got two. But with strong wish and tremendous efforts he couldn’t get more water.

He lost his faith in wishing.

He lost faith in efforts.

He lost faith in ambition and progress.

Unsatisfied he was. And he was also unhappy.